Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Making power moves

I love this article because I admit at some point or another, I’ve done all of these in the name of “GROW THE FUCK UP, MEN.” 

#1 Deeactivate ‘free’ dating apps, sites.  I’ll disagree with this, I think OkCupid has more critical mass than the paid sites. But Tinder is a joke.

#2 Run at the first “if you want.”  I’ve mentioned that I hate when guys do the “We could meet up if you want” or “let me know if you’d like to go out again.”  Man up, ask me out.

#3 Avoid the couch at all costs.  Well, this is a no-brainer for not getting assaulted.  But more importantly, a little effort and indication he wants to be seen in public with you is rather important.

#4 Don’t settle for anything less than a real date.  The guys who want to meet up while we’re both out, thereby he doesn’t have to inconvenience himself and use his friends as a crutch?  No thanks.

#5 Call him out on his bullshit.  I’ve done it, the guys who want to meet but can never schedule a real date.  Not worth it.

#6 Be up front about what you’re looking for.  I don’t think you need to say on the first date that you want a boyfriend and maybe future husband, but your actions indicate what you’re willing to put up with, i.e. not #2-4.

Monday, September 15, 2014


#girlproblems #socialmediawoes  When you stalk your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend on Instagram, accidentally 'like' a picture, and no amount of tapping will undo your 'like.'  The only solution is to delete your Instagram account and deny, deny, deny.

For the record, this happened to a girlfriend.  All of my unhealthy relationship behavior is limited strictly to the wanderings of my mind.

Sunday, September 14, 2014

Maybe it's the full moon...

Who's been a beast about writing fun blog posts lately?

My PMS has been extra bad the last few months.  I'm moodier and more temperamental than usual.   I now owe BF an apology for getting angry at him for not being able to read my mind...assuming he still wants to deal with this ball of hormonal feminine energy.  It may be time to switch pills again.

The new therapist I'm seeing is great, a grandfatherly 70-something type, and far less distracting than Dr. McHottness.  But the new therapist wisely pointed out that my frequent discussion of my problems, be it with friends or this blog, puts my brain in intense analysis mode, when I really just need not overthink.

My main physical response to anxiety and stress is sleeping.  I've been sleeping 9-10 hours a night, which may sound heavenly, but it's exhausting and makes me feel pathetic.

On that note, back to binge watching Mad Men...

Sunday, September 7, 2014

The nerve of some people

I'm truly amazed at the nerve of some men.  Last year in late October, I'd been chatting with a guy on OkCupid, who asked me out but then blew me off twice.  Read this post for background, where I debate whether I should send him a snarky text.  (Is a snarky text worth it?)

He's saved in my phone as Flaky Ass [Name].  I'd randomly received generic texts on holidays which I'd ignored.  Then last night, after many months of radio silence, he sent a 2:30am text refreshing my memory as to who he was: "We'd chatted awhile back on OkC but never met up, and I think we should :)"

Um, no fucking way.  Hoping to shut him up forever, I said "I have a boyfriend, sorry."  Not that I needed to be apologizing.

He wrote back something silly, clearly trying to joke, about how me having a man didn't matter to him.  20 minutes later, when I hadn't written, he said "Besides I have a gf."

Ballsy little jackass!  Not only have we never met in person, but he claims to have a girlfriend and is sending me texts at booty-call hour?!

Friday, September 5, 2014

What's the male equivalent of "mistress" that isn't as icky-sounding as "lover"?  

Asking for a friend.

Saturday, August 30, 2014


In what can only be described as a "YOLO decision", I'm spending the long weekend on a romantic Hawaiian getaway...with my friend Charlotte! 

Last week Charlotte asked if I wanted to do a last minute trip to a Hawaii for Labor Day, because she'd found a decent deal. Hard to turn that down, right? :)

Thursday, August 28, 2014


Sometimes I think I'm imagining things.  That my mind is playing tricks on me.  That words I heard were never actually spoken.

Last night, as BF and I were saying good bye for a long weekend, he said "love you."  Unprompted, for the first time, since I blurted it out a few weeks ago.  "Love you too," I responded and kissed him once more.

Those sweet words echoed through my mind as I fell asleep.  Feeling a bit day-dreamy this morning, I thought "Wait! Could I have misheard him?  What if he said 'olive juice'?  What if I just heard what I wanted to hear?"

This is where I remind myself that I was not in fact expecting to hear that sentiment from him, and my mental state has not regressed so far as to be hearing things.


Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Selling yourself to a date

I'm sharing this article because it's hilarious:  a man who listed very specific conditions about a woman in order to date her.  Among them were "must maintain slim hourglass body" and "cannot go number two at his house."

What are some of the weird requirements you've heard from men?  I've heard:  no vegetarians, must not be afraid to ride on a motorcycle, must be able to ski on a black diamond slope, must be completely hairless down there.

The weirdest I've heard from a guy, who clearly meant it as praise, was that he couldn't be with a woman who had pale-colored nipples.

Monday, August 11, 2014


An interesting look at "read receipts" on phones, and how privacy keeps taking a hit.  I'm enjoying the #Love series on TechCrunch.  I particularly like the quotes from women who say they don't always read texts from men right away just to keep the mystery going.

I never use read receipts for texts.  It just opens myself up to getting offended if someone sees my text but takes hours or days to respond.

BF and I have a mixed-device relationship so the read receipts don't work and we can't see each other typing.  Thank goodness.


Monday, August 4, 2014

Is butter a carb?

I returned from my week of travels last night.  As much as I love seeing family and being in my architecturally gorgeous home city, it's great to be back!

BF and I had plans to hang out the night I returned; we ordered take out and caught up.  We kept in regular touch while I was away; sent brief emails once a day and chatted on the phone a couple of times.  It was the perfect amount of contact for me, not overwhelming but enough to share tidbits until we could talk.

Impulse decision of the week:  I joined Weight Watchers online, in a fit of frustration after my mom pointed out my recent weight gain.  The goal is 10 lbs, which is enough to fit into my "happy" size 6.