Much of my attitude in the straight vs. curly debate comes from slightly patronizing comments from friends who say they wish they had hair like mine I know we all what we can’t have, but I don’t wish my hard-to-manage frizzy hair on anyone. You see, unlike straight hair, curly hair takes a lot more effort to look good. While straight hair turns out pretty similar every time, my hair can easily vary from nicely-formed curls to toilet-brush hair.
Every dating expert I’ve ever read encourages women to wear their hair straight. They claim that men like soft, silky, shiny hair they can run their fingers through. Men do not want to get their hands caught on a curly, frizzy tangled mess.
Fine, I understand that women need to invest in their appearance in order to succeed personally and professionally; deny it all we want, we’re judged on our appearances. But what frustrates me is that we can’t help what texture hair we were born with, just like we can’t change our skin color and general body shape without expensive procedures.
My own romantic partners have had varying opinions. 2 different guys in my curly days who thought my big curly hair was sexy, but they also never once saw me with straight hair. A couple of guys who saw my hair both ways said they much preferred the straight look.
On the flip side, I do like how curly hair makes me stand out in my family. Among my 21(!) first cousins, my brother and I are the only ones who inherited our paternal grandmother’s curly mop.
Last year in Brazil, I got my hair Japanese (permanently) straightened. For a year, I felt confident, modern, and sexy. And having manageable hair was a dream!
Now that my curly hair is nearly grown back, I’m at the point where I need to decide. Should I
a) Spend $700 on permanent straightening (aka Japanese straightening)
b) Spend $200-$300 on Keratin smoothing – washes out after a couple of months, still requires a bit of flat ironing, but may let me have wavy hair
c) Do nothing and own my curls again
Curly haired girls, I’d love your thoughts. I may just be crazy. But hearing the dating ‘experts’, men I’ve dated, and my own friends say that straight > curly, it’s really discouraging.